Monday 23 April 2012

FARMER TED AND BALLS IN THE AIR

I haven't written anything on this blog for a very long while. Not that I haven't been writing- I have been involved in the very interesting and challenging process of group writing a play- but I have been trying to keep all my activities going and of course, I have not always succeeded.

Some time ago, I wrote this little story for my grandson Ted. The story is of course about myself. It seems particularly appropriate today, when I am contemplating going out to buy a pump for our new water feature, phoning people about the above mentioned play, starting work on a major piece of jewellery, doing the Fountain Gallery stewarding rota for May, continuing to work on the Kindle version of The Boy with Two Heads, sorting out the mess of paperwork in my office,  or writing updates for my various blogs. The point is they all need doing! Will I keep them all in the air, or will I drop one? Did I mention that the oven needs cleaning? Better not!

Available as a free ebook on Smashwords, but published here as well for those of you without Kindles, Kobos or ipads.

For free upload click here: Farmer Ted's Easy Day 


 “Great!” thought Ted as he woke up that morning, “- an easy day! Nothing to do at all really.
 “I’ll just go and look at my sheep before I have breakfast.”
 So he did.
 And noticed that the bit of string which held the gate shut was frayed.
 “Oh dear!” he said, “better fix that”.
 So he went to the kitchen drawer for another bit of string.
 And noticed that the tap was dripping.
 “Oh bother!” he said, “better fix that”.
 So he left the string beside the kitchen sink, and went out to the barn for a spanner.
 And noticed that there was a loose screw in one of the barn door hinges.
 “Oh no!” he said, “Better fix that.”
 So he left the spanner in the barn and went to the tractor shed for a screwdriver.
 And noticed that one of the bricks in the path was sticking up.
 So he left the screwdriver by the path and went to the garden shed for a spade.
 And noticed that the sheep had got out of the field because the string on the gate had broken!
 So he shouted for the dog, ran back up the path and tripped over the raised brick.
 “Knickers!” he said.
 As he lay there, rubbing his head, he stared at the screwdriver and said “What on earth is that doing there?”
 At which point, one of the sheep ran into the barn door. The door fell off, and hit Ted on the head.
 “Oh bother!” he said, “better fix that”.
 So he went into the kitchen to find a sticking plaster in the drawer.
 And noticed that the tap was dripping-
 “Oh dear, better fix … What on earth is that doing there?” he said as he saw the string beside the sink.

And then he remembered- this was supposed to be his easy day!
 “Oh well”, he said a “I suppose a farmer’s work is never done” 

So…
 he whistled up the dog,
 rounded up the sheep,
 tied up the gate,
 screwed up the barn door,
 dug up the sticking out brick,
 tightened up the tap,
 and made himself a cup of tea.

He sat down to drink his tea and think about what he was going to eat for breakfast.
 And noticed that the kitchen clock said five thirty.
 “Great!” thought Ted, “- an easy evening! Nothing to do at all really.”
 So he put a sticking plaster on his sore head, cooked himself egg and bacon for tea, and settled down to a nice easy evening.

And thought about all the jobs he had to do tomorrow.